And no, that doesn't apply to my family.
"This is the perfect audience, of course, for a lawyer joke.... But I don't tell lawyer jokes anymore. It turns out that the lawyers in the audience don't think they're very funny, and the non-lawyers don't think they're jokes."
"I would like to congratulate the families as well. I know that behind every Georgetown Law graduate stands the support of family, presumably at this point perilously close to bankruptcy. To those family members I would say this: Do not believe your graduate when she tells you that she cannot write the will, or help you with that dispute with your neighbor over the fence. You've paid for the privilege of free legal advice for the rest of your life."
The full text of the speech is available on Georgetown's site.
The AP also reported on the speech.
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